Becoming a Donor: Recipient Experiences

elow are testimonials from some of the recipients who have been matched with a donor by NY LifeSpring LLC. Due to the confidential nature of egg donation, names have been omitted.

     "While we are still holding our breath for another couple of months 'til we are a little in the clear, we wanted to let you know (which no words can really adequately express) how deeply, deeply grateful we are to you, for so many things: for your careful listening and attentiveness from the beginning, attention to details, skill and focus in moving the process forward, your investment in us - your commitment throughout this process bas been amazing to watch and we are so grateful to you for all your skill and efforts to make this happen for us. We are hoping for good results and will keep you posted but wanted to acknowledge to you without delay just bow grateful we are you have gotten us to this point - we never would have been here without you. For that we cannot thank you enough.

So, as words are inadequate, we thought we'd at least try brownies! Please enjoy some of these samplers - they go terrific with tea, coffee or cocoa especially as the weather cools, and they freeze well if you don't want to eat them all at once!

With thanks and so much appreciation & gratitude - we look forward to keeping you posted!"

     "Dear egg donor, Words do a poor job of expressing the heart sometimes, and this is one of those moments. All week long when you were preparing for your egg retrieval I would send you loving thoughts and prayers. For your health and well-being, for a positive experience and outcome. Mostly I felt so full of gratitude that although I know there is a monetary exchange involved, still what you have given us can't even be measured. The gift you have given us is life itself. True, we must take it from here but I, we are so grateful to you for the gift you have given, for the possibility of having children and being parents. This road has been a long one but in truth it's just beginning and you are now a source for new hope, new life, and a chance for us to realize our dreams. Thank you so much! Todah raba raba! May every wish you have for yourself come to fruition. May you flourish in your career, relationships, health, and in motherhood when you are ready.

So much love and gratitude"

     "Discovering NY LifeSpring was truly a blessing. Their process is discreet, thorough and timely. Ruth is caring, knowledgeable and provides direction and suggestions every step of the way which was a great comfort. I'll always remember her powerful words telling me "I'm going to make a point of helping you", and indeed with her help we found a Jewish donor who was a good fit for our family's background and ethnicity. In addition to matching us with a quality donor, she pointed us to the San Diego Fertility Center where we had the most incredible experience of our entire IVF journey. The medical staff including our physician, the specialists, nurses, and embryologists were fantastic, from their guidance to their ongoing communication every step of the way, they provided the very best in care at all times. We are deeply grateful to have worked with NY LifeSpring and for all the miracles that have unfolded in our lives ever since.

     "I wanted to thank you for all of the time and effort you took to make this process as seamless for us as possible.

It all fell together so quickly, we can only think that it was all due to your expertise and kindness."

     [ Note: This entry excerpted with permission from a recipient's letter to her donor. ]
     "We just wanted to express our sincerest thanks and appreciation to you for everything that you have gone through. We have had a very difficult past few years with respect to having children on our own, and we have been through a lot.

It is through extremely generous and giving acts such as the donation of your eggs, that people like us can finally have a realistic hope of starting a family. That hope would never have been possible if it were not for you."

     [ Note: This entry excerpted with permission from a recipient's letter to her donor. ]
     "I wanted to welcome you to NY and I am truly sorry that I won't have the opportunity to kiss you, have a coffee with you and tell you personally what your helping us means for us.

I can tell you that when I saw your picture all of my fears about this went away, and that you were the only one for me. How can this be? We don't know each other. How come when I write or think about you even if I never know your name I feel so connected to you? I don't know, call it an intuition or the fact that you seem so close to your family ( I am so close to mine). Could it be that you sent a picture with your grandmother and I was raised by my grandmother? Or that you describe your mother as being made to love and I could say the same of mine? Or that you are a dancer and so was I? Or that you are part Polish and so am I? The list goes on and on. For me, you have truly kind and loving eyes. That's the most important thing for me. I showed your picture to my aunt (my mother died) and she said this is the girl I want in our family. Everyone had a similar reaction. It's as if you have an extended family in us, everyone is loving you and sending you all the positive thoughts and hopes for the best future for you here! And you don't even know us.

I am a person who says what she feels and you should know that no matter what the outcome will be you have done the most wonderful and loving act anyone could imagine. You are a brave and loving person and I only wish you the best for you and your family!!!!

I send you a big kiss and even if we never meet I can say that I love you for your willingness to help someone less fortunate than you."

     "We want to thank you for all you've done in helping us on our long journey to becoming parents; we feel very lucky to have found you. It's amazing that a situation which could easily have been fraught with stress was handled so professionally, yet personally, by you.

Obviously it's hard to put into words all that we feel right now, but let me just say how happy we are that you have chosen to run your service."

     "I want to thank you for helping us to fulfill our dream of becoming parents. Thanks to you and our donor, we have a miraculous child. It's impossible to express our gratitude."

     "Not only did you help us, you did more. We always saw that in you every time we asked a question. Could someone be so nice and always go out of their way? Well, we went with our hearts and trusted you, and we are so happy that we did. Thank you very much."

     "Words cannot express my gratitude... Thank you so much for your kindness, patience and generosity. It must be so rewarding to be a part of such a miracle! Thank you for helping us make our dream of having a family come true."

     "Thank you for all of your assistance, guidance and support. You made everything a lot easier. We are very grateful."

     "Thank you for your help, compassion and guidance during our journey. We could not have done this without you! You are truly an inspiration and beacon of hope. You have made a difference in our lives and for that we will never forget you."

     "After many years of miscarriages with no live baby, we made the decision to opt for egg donation. This was a hard decision to make but one thing was absolutely important to us—to have a Jewish donor. Our medical facility recommended Ruth Tavor, explaining that the young women she attracts have always been of the finest, highest caliber. I learned that Ruth is not only interested in donors that are intelligent, educated, attractive and mature but also in that special "x" factor ... she wants to discover a sense of mission in each girl, a type of big hearted compassion that motivates their desire to donate. Additionally, Ruth allows couples to choose the right donor for them by supplying a variety of photos and a comprehensive questionnaire. She may have a suggestion, but never takes it personally if you disagree or wish to keep on looking until you feel the right connection. She wants you to be happy. In terms of details, Ruth is on top of the most minute part of the process—coordinating with another recipient couple or medical facility if you wish to do a shared cycle, making sure the donor's travel and housing arrangements are taken care of and in short, facilitating the process. She is on your team from beginning to end and makes the donors feel comfortable, too."

     "After many attempts through in-vitro fertilization, my husband and I were faced with a very difficult decision, at the time, whether to proceed with egg donation. After meeting Ruth Tavor, after our consultation, there was no question we were at the right place. Throughout the process, we found Ruth to be professional, genuinely caring and always there if any question needed to be answered. It is a stressful period, difficult decisions need to be made, and Ruth was always encouraging. What struck us was that she was equally interested in our needs as well as the donors.

During my pregnancy there were frequent calls from Ruth to see how I was progressing and always, once again, encouraging words. There is absolutely no question in our minds that having gone through NY LifeSpring was our good fortune and would be anyone's good fortune, as well. We have a wonderful family now, and I can't thank Ruth enough."

     "As we have entered our 4th month, it's beginning to sink in. And we want you to know how happy we are and how thankful. We really appreciate your great help and your great service - the wonderful donors and fast availability. Thanks again for all your special and personal attention."

     "I am glad to confirm that our relationship with Ruth Tavor was completely satisfactory. We found her very understanding of our needs, ready to push the boundaries of what could be done, attentive to detail, professional and caring, if at times unconventional in her approach. We enjoyed the experience, and it resulted in what appears now to be close to a miracle. We highly recommend Ruth to whoever is in need of the very special services she provides."

     "Ruth Tavor is the kind of professional you want on your side when you decide to pursue egg donation. We are currently clients of NY LifeSpring, and from a recipient's perspective she is organized, attentive and responsive. Equally as important, we feel like she cares about us and genuinely wants to help us have a child. She has a gentle touch when you are going through a difficult time emotionally. We believe her professionalism and caring nature transfer to her relationships with her donors and with medical professionals, too.

After going through a few unsuccessful in-vitro attempts, it was a major decision for us to use an egg donor. Ruth understands exactly what we're going through, and listened attentively as we explained our situation. We have told her the characteristics which are important to us in a donor, and she listens carefully. Ruth describes available donors with pride, as if they were her own sisters, and we believe she treats them as if they are part of her own family. We are very pleased with the selection of donors Ruth has offered us.

Ruth follows through and follows up on the smallest details, keeps us informed and is available for questions. She is a compassionate, optimistic woman who cares about everyone involved in an egg donation cycle."

     "After a four year struggle with infertility, my husband and I finally made the decision to pursue our goal of parenthood through the use of donor eggs. Though the decision was a difficult one for us, the process was made infinitely easier through our relationship with Ruth Tavor and NY LifeSpring. Ruth guided us through this journey with great sensitivity, sound advice and tremendous patience. Our first consultation lasted more than three hours as Ruth questioned us about our backgrounds and requirements and shared her database of donors. We were impressed not only by her attention to us, her clients, but also to her donors. Ruth spends a tremendous amount of time screening the women she recommends as donors, coordinating testing and treatment and accompanying her donors during the egg retrieval. As a result, she has gained the trust and admiration of donors and recipients alike. After receiving the news that we are pregnant with twins, Ruth continued to monitor our progress and provide encouragement during the difficult, first trimester of our pregnancy. We are extraordinarily grateful to have worked with Ruth Tavor, whose empathy and expertise helped us achieve our dream of starting a family."

     "Ruth gets it. Intuitive, perceptive and supportive, she understands the profoundness of ovum donation, yet she's thoroughly practical, a sane soul-sister by your side from start to finish. She finds and watches over some lovely donors from Israel whom she vets with rigor and then communicates both their strengths -- and weaknesses -- to you, the recipient. All through the process, Ruth is there for you -- or not, if that's what you prefer. In the clinical world of assisted reproductive technologies, NY LifeSpring is homegrown and personal; it's an oasis of compassion and care. I can't imagine going through ovum donation any other way."

     "From my point of view, if couples need to go the DE route, they should use for that NY LifeSpring. Ruth Tavor fully understands the needs and wishes of recipients and helps dealing with stress they are under. She is a very warm and compassionate person, who you can talk to and trust. She spends as much time as needed with the recipient; you feel like a you are talking to very good and knowledgeable friend. Very protective of donors, she takes good care of them - such as dealing with RMA - which is one of the best facilities. She meets donors after the retrieval, and provides their transport for going home. I found it incredibly warm, nice and touching. The whole DE experience is not easy, at times stressful, but with Ruth's help and coordination it becomes not business but a very personal life experience. We are extremely pleased with the work she has done, and the continuation of her support after we received the good news, as well as during the other difficult times."

     "I ... wanted to let you know that without having met you and gotten this process started again, we would not be parents today. You [helped] us [to push] past our ambivalence and led us ultimately to search for the right facility for us.

From your encouragement and enthusiasm we decided to continue, and the result is our little girl, whom we would love for you to meet."